January Family Funnies

“What is a smart pig called?”

“Swine-Stein?”

“A Cunning Ham!”

“What do you call a pig that bakes?” “Ba-Kin!”


Ellie offered me some of her bowl of goldfish & pretzels. I said “No thank you, I can’t have any.”

Emma pipes in with “They have salt on them. Can you have salt?”

Me: “Yes, I can have salt. Are you saying I should just eat the salt off them?”

Emma: “Sure! I like to eat salt!”


I was eating some of my chocolate avocado pudding – I had put it in the freezer for a few hours so it was kind of like a fudge pop.

Lizzy looks at it & says “It’s Chocolate guacamole!” 😂😊

(I had been eating guacamole earlier in the day)


“Why are you just wearing a white t-shirt & nothing else?”

Child 1…”Because he’s a boy….”

Child 2…”At least he’s wearing pants!” 😂 🤷‍♀️


“Marinara sauce is the same as pizza sauce…. I mean, it basically is, right?” 😊